Chivalry

I still appreciate chivalry. It came as a great surprise and delight to me when I came to boarding school that boys held doors open for me. Not just hold the door open so I could catch it, but actually hold it as I passed through. I like the idea of men paying for meals at dates, though I'm not against Dutch dating. I feel like a princess when people pull out chairs for me. All and all, I enjoy being pampered.

I've gotten into some heated discussions with boys about where chivalry fits in in today's modern society. Or rather, whether or not it fits in. The argument is essentially, well you're a feminist and all about equality for men and women, so why are you okay with us getting jipped? My first answer is that to have equal rights doesn't mean that everyone has to be the same. Slightly different standards for polite behavior aren't necessarily a bad thing. It's essentially this: it's the same reason that girl's don't generally tell boys to their faces that penises are really funny looking. Because it doesn't hurt you not to do it, and also that women like power. We like the acknowledgement that we control the precious vaginas.

There was a great moment in an English class where one girl commented that the character in a story got what every woman wants, which is to control men. The boys in the class shifted uncomfortably, suddenly sharply aware of something I think we all subconsciously know. There's an Arthurian legend that tells us that what women want most in the world is their own way. We want to be swept off our feet, but we want to choose the knight, the horse, and the armor.

So stick it through with the chivalrous manners, because it's the second most appealing thing to many women, the first being men serenading us while playing guitar. So either let your hands fall on a guitar or a door handle. And suck it up.