The Christmas Party
The Christmas Party Scenarios, Part One
The Neighbor's Christmas Party
You don't really know these neighbors, and they don't really know you. The only reason they're interested in your attending the Christmas party is one of two reasons: that you'd know if they invited everyone else and not you, and your dog has large poop that might mysteriously end up on their lawn. The second reason is that they're interested in filling the house and not having leftover buffet food. You will attend this party because, if you're not going to another party, the neighbors might be able to tell that you just didn't feel like going. And there are some hazy, unknown consequences that we assume will result from this. Also, you must assess their value as people by seeing what kind of food they provide.
At the party, you stay in a tight pack with your family, separating only to sample parts of the buffet or engage in conversation with other neighbors who've come for the same reason. As the night progresses, you find yourself separated and socializing. Even those who stand in the corner or sit in an overstuffed chair and try to keep their mouths full at all times to prevent conversation are sucked in by the blond, talkative woman who insists on meeting everyone she can find.
You drift through the night, not quite enjoying yourself, but not bored either. Many people who are actually friends with the hosts walk over and try to engage you in conversation. If you're a teenager, they assume not that you're someone they should know, but that you're the child of someone they should know. How could we not have met the child of the (supposedly) dear friends of our host? These people will have infinitely disappointed looks when you reveal that you're simply the neighbor's surly teenager, not the friend-of-a-friend's surly teenager that they were hoping for. They pretend to see another person they know (really just another friend of the host's whom they have yet to pick for information) and waltz off, rum and Coke in hand.
Monday: Part 2, The Non-Christmas Party
posted by Meredith at 7:18 PM
2 Comments:
Assuming that this blog is suffused with awesome, I concur that you have a flux capacitator with which the fusion is done. Therefore, you are a rich snob who I should not be conversing.
I'm going to assume that you're referring to a flux capacitor, as in a component of the time-travel car in Back to the Future. Though I didn't know it did fusion, or had anything to do with something being suffused. And, given that I do in fact own a flux capacitor and can therefore travel through time, it probably is safe to assume that I'm a rich snob who isn't worth conversing with. But I can live with that, because heck, I can travel to the future.
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